Thanksgiving

It seems like an odd time for thanksgiving: the end of something. It seems like I should be angry or spiteful or sad or ..., and I am a little of all those things. But I find myself striving to stay in a mood of thanksgiving. It seems to help my memories and feelings to remain true to reality. Anger and spite throw old events and thoughts out of proportion, they make me want to say things that aren't true: to radicalize my entire past.

Sadness and self-pity twist my mind a different direction. They encourage me to rewrite my role in life as a victim: As one who has no control over what befalls him. Well that's not true. I made decisions every day that defined who I was. I can't change my past anymore than I can reverse gravity.

Turning to look at my life and see what I have to be thankful for causes me to look at it (somewhat objectivly) and remember it all. To treat it all as fact and realize that whatever was

I get to choose what comes from here on.
And that feeling makes me thankful. :)